My Encounter with Jesus

For countless months I’ve been beseeching my Lord during precious quiet times that I might have an encounter with Him; to experience His manifest presence.

Maybe 2 months ago, my younger sister Michelle notified me of a healing conference in her area and asked me to pray about whether I should go or not. Through believing for my healing, God has intimately brought me closer and closer to my true heart’s desire, which is to know my Healer. I asked my LORD about going and He replied, yes. Not only once, but several times, He answered me through His word. My husband gave me his blessing and we bought a ticket to fly north.

My time of waiting was filled with anticipation as the cry of my heart continued to be, “Jesus, I don’t want to ‘just’ be healed, I want to see Your face, encounter Your presence, to meet with You.”

A few weeks prior to leaving, the Lord spoke to my heart to fast for 3 days, and confirms His Word through scripture. I’m determined to hear His voice and walk in obedience.
I long to know His Father’s Heart. My sister feels led to join me in the 3 day fast.

Attending the 2-day sessions and evening services of the conference were glorious experiences, for the sheer delight of being with fellow worshippers who were unabashed in their expressions of love and adoration for the KING OF KINGS.

On the 3rd day of the conference, our fast was complete and we ate in faith. That morning the LORD reminded me of Daniel and his 21-day fast, that the angel came ‘after’ the fast was over. (See Daniel chapter 10). I sensed that my LORD was telling me that I too was going to experience Him upon the completion of my fast…which meant today was the day!

We attended a special ministry luncheon and went through a prayer line. They anointed our heads with oil and spoke words of knowledge over us. A woman laid her hands on me and said, “God has heard your heart’s desire and He is right now going to give you your heart’s desire.” I tucked that away in my heart.

It was the 2:00 session and the speaker, who was also a worship leader, called all who were sick to come forward and find a place on the floor. I went up, walking with my cane for support, in anticipation. I sat with my legs straight in front of me, back upright (with no back support) on the floor up near the alter. I closed my eyes and began to worship my King. The speaker encouraged us to picture ourselves worshipping uninhibited, all alone in a field of tall grass. While doing just what he had said, I saw myself dancing! I was dancing before the LORD in worship to Him. With my hands lifted up twirling and dancing, Jesus entered the “vision” and danced with me. My LORD danced and twirled me in the field of tall grass. The vision ended.

I continued to worship Him, my eyes closed, thanking Him for the beautiful vision He just gave me. (To understand the significance you need to realize I haven’t been able to walk unassisted, let alone dance, for almost 8 years).

Then it happened….I distinctly saw Jesus (with my eyes closed), walking through the crowd of people, towards me, touching several worshipper’s heads along the way. The God of all creation bent over and smiled at me, almost playfully. He then lowered Himself down to one knee and proceeded to sit casually at my feet “Indian Style” (legged crossed). I noticed His sandaled feet, and white robe.

I glanced down (the whole time I have this ‘vision’ my eyes were closed), and saw His hand on my chest! I immediately grab onto His hand with both of mine. This is how others observed me for hours with my hands clasped over my chest. I cannot begin to describe how real this encounter with Jesus truly was. The tender words He spoke, the way He looked, the atmosphere of His Presence was truly beyond words. I saw different features (hands, feet, forearms etc…) rather than a complete picture and I sensed it was a matter of trust.

During my time with Jesus, He shared some very specific and personal things with me. He did not speak in audible words, His lips never moved, but rather we communicated via the language of Heaven…heart to heart. He also allowed me to see things in the spirit realm.

At some point I looked down and noticed His forearm instead of His hands, indicating He had changed positions, I now noticed that He was holding my hands. My sister and others observed these slight changes, for they were the only discernable movement during the 9 hours that I sat there with Jesus! My sister said that I had such an expression of “Bliss” on my face, she just knew that THE KING OF GLORY was there~ she got a purple flag and began to wave it in honor of His literal Presence in our midst.

Several times I thanked Abba (Daddy Father God~) for sending His Son to spend time with me, and when I did I saw Jesus smile. It brought Him such pleasure when I thanked the Father. I also saw Jesus smile several times during worship; I sensed His pleasure in our worship of Him.

About 2/3rds of the way through the 9 hours, the evening speaker asked the children if Jesus had given any of them a word of knowledge? A young boy about 6 or 7 years old went to the microphone and said Jesus told him to pray for a woman with a cane. The young boy and several others gathered around me and laid hands upon me. Then a young woman came and sat behind me and she began to pray not only with power and authority, but with very specific detail concerning my condition including the tumor, my spinal cord, my nerves etc… that I knew she was hearing directly from Him! (I later discovered that earlier that day while in coffee shop, I man came up to this college student and told her she would later be praying over a woman with a cane! That’s why she responded when the young boy announced it over the microphone!) As she prayed, I could feel warmth radiating from where her hands were on my back. The prayer from her and others around me continued for over an hour then I knew it was time. Excitedly I yelled out and they lifted me up. With a young woman on either side of me, we began to walk. With every step my stride lengthened as my legs felt lighter and stronger! It was happening!! I could feel it happening!! My sister was ahead of us videoing, while my niece was behind me walking and watching. We walked once around the sanctuary when a woman abruptly stopped us and asked us to pray over a young paralytic. He had seen me walking and all of us praising God and assumed my miracle was complete. Even though we were in the throes of the long awaited miracle of my healing, we never hesitated to go pray over him. We prayed for quite some time and witnessed the move of the Spirit upon His life as he gave his life to Christ. All the while I couldn’t help but notice the longer I stood still, the miraculous changes in my condition were regressing. It was as if strength was receding while my legs got heavier and heavier.

When we finished praying, I asked the girls to walk with me again, but it wasn’t the same. Instead of the lightness and strength, I felt heaviness. Instead of my feet automatically lifting higher and higher, they began to drag and shuffle across the floor. It was after 1 am and the church was closing up for the evening. Sadness and disappointment overwhelmed me….I began to blame myself for not “possessing” my miracle….to see it finished. I was supposed to run. I was distracted. I messed up God’s plan. (Notice how the enemy tried to turn my focus from the glorious gaze of Jesus and His work onto myself and my supposed failure). I eventually went to bed, but not before I wrote out my entire encounter with Jesus in detail until 4:20 am.

I wanted to bask in the reality of my encounter with Jesus but I could not push away the tortured thoughts that I somehow messed up God’s plan to manifest my healing. Thoughts of TRUTH did penetrate my heart of despair knowing our Omnipresent God lives outside of time. He knew all that happened was going to happen. I could NOT mess up any plan of God. Yes, maybe it was a distraction and I didn’t receive my healing in completion. But…what satan meant for harm…God will turn for HIS GOOD. My thoughts swung back and forth from faith to fear and eventually I fell into a fitful sleep. An hour later, I bolted awake to an all-out assault of torturous thoughts. Though I should have resisted them, I found myself wrestling with them back and forth from mind to heart.

Exhausted, I finally fell back to sleep, only to awake the next morning to an overwhelming presence of grief. After my mom and niece left to go back home, my sister, sensing in her spirit what was going on inside of me, prayed and spoke truth over me. She reminded me that the God of all creation left the right hand of the Father for 9 hours to sit with me. She commanded the discouragement, grief, and disappointment to leave in Jesus name. She also reminded me how He answered the very cry of my heart! I had repeatedly asked to have an intimate encounter, to behold His face. She retold the power and reality of this supernatural experience and how the enemy wanted to steal the power and joy of it all. All sadness and discouragement LEFT. I kid you not, it was completely gone. My heart lifted, and rejoiced in God as I began to praise Him.

My LORD and savior Yeshua, came and visited me and sat with me for almost 9 hours. Thank you Abba Yehovah, thank you Yeshua, my King and my bridegroom God.

I have never been more sure than now, that my body will respond to the work that the LORD Himself had done (not only on the cross) but while with me. I WILL RUN ON THIS SIDE OF HEAVEN. I choose this day and every day to trust in Jesus.

Oh how HE loves me ~ but realize precious child of God… just how much HE loves you too. That is one of the messages of this entire encounter… that God the Son would leave heaven to sit with a “nobody.” I’m no one famous, just a housewife and mother of 4, longing for MORE OF HIM. I long to know my Jesus, and the wonders of His person. He responds to every longing heart! Simply ask Him. Jer 29:13 “And you will seek ME and find ME, when you search for ME with all your heart.”

The most amazing experience of my life

I've been asking in my heart of hearts to behold Jesus, yet in my wildest dreams I did not expect to have the kind of intimate encounter that I had this past weekend. Jesus told me healing would come with the "laying on of hands" but how could I possibly anticipate they would actually be HIS HANDS?? You won't want to miss the "rest of the story"...so come back soon to hear the detailed, life-changing encounter!!

Unbroken Relationship

As I've been journeying to know God better, deeper, I've begun reading the Bible with my "love" glasses on. The bible is God's love story. Do you want to know who God is? Read about Him in the pages of the Bible.

God's plan was to create man and walk with him in perfect unbroken relationship for eternity.

Guess what? That plan has not changed.

God never desired our bodies to decay, that was a result of free will. Man, (Adam and Eve) chose to exercise their free will and disobey God, which resulted in separation and death.

God continued to pursue His creation, but they were distracted and preoccupied with themselves and their fleshly desires. (Read the account of Noah) Then a man (Abraham), chose to know God intimately and so much so, God called him "friend" and through Abraham made a nation (Israel) to set apart for Himself. Desiring to walk with man in unbroken relationship and to be their God, their provider and their healer.

Once again man, this time His very own chosen people, rejected Him, chosing instead to pursue other 'gods'.

God still longed for intimacy with man, this had never changed, because God never changes. The Word says that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. So God's plan never did change either...He walked with man in the garden and He still longs to walk with man now.

God then did the unthinkable, He came down, took on flesh and walked as man. God, the One and Only Living God, creator of all, walking as man? Yes! Jesus Christ is God incarnate, Immanuel (God with us). The Father's heart toward man was expressed through His Son. (John 3:16) Jesus Himself said He only did and said what He seen the Father do and what the Father told Him. (John 14:10) Jesus says in John 10:30, "I and The Father are one". Hebrews 1:3, Col. 1:15 (esp Amp) says that Jesus is the expess image of the Father, His exact representation. Jesus also said that the Father was in Him and He in the Father.(John 14:10,11)

Jesus told Phillip that seeing Him was seeing the Father. (John 14:9)

Jesus came and took on flesh for one reason only! To bring people back into unbroken fellowship with Himself and the Father (remember they are one). In order to that, He had to walk a sinless life, which He did. He had to shed His blood for the atonement of our sins, (paying the full penalty for our sins) which He did. We now have full access to unbroken fellowship with the Living God. Jesus made that possible.

How amazing is that? God's done all the work for us, we only have to believe and accept His sacrifice, His work on our behalf.

Oh how I love you ~ Yeshua!!

Oh how I love you~ Yehovah!!

Read His word, get to know The God who passionately pursues your heart and made a way for you to have an intimate unbroken relationship with Him. Believe in Him, He's real! Don't take my word for it, read about Him and then ask Him yourself. He will reveal Himself to you too. But He doesn't just want you to believe on Him and then go about your life...the whole point was unbroken relationship.....remember?

If you've never accepted His sacrifice on your behalf, won't you now? God's word says in Rom 10:9,10..."that if you confess with your mouth, Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead you shall be saved. For with the heart man believes (trusting in and relying on Christ and what He's done for you), resulting in righteousness (right standing with God), and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation."

Being a christian is all about being WITH GOD!! Literally walking with God in unbroken relationship. As we pursue Him in this relationship and come to know who He is, our faith in Him grows and we become more like Him (taking on His character, by being with Him). It's about returning to Eden, spiritually speaking.

God's word says in 1 Cor 6:17 that our spirits are united as one with God's own spirit when we become followers of Christ (born-again)! Sound radical? It is! God made that possible through Jesus Christ.

Even if you know Jesus as savior and are born-again, do you know Him intimately? Can you describe Him? Do you long for His company? Get to know the Living God~ talk with Him frequently and wait on Him to talk back (this is hard, because we have soooo many distractions, but its worth it!) Read about Him in His word.

He's actively calling out to you, won't you respond to His call?

P.S.

Yes, I do realize that summer is over and that I haven't received my healing yet. Stay posted, because I believe with all my heart that I will. I will not be moved nor shaken, for I trust in God and God alone. He is faithful, it is who He is. I do long for my body to be healed and to be whole again, but even more so do I long to know the Healer. It is He who satisfies my soul. Please read the new post that I just logged moments ago.

Experiencing God

Do you long for peace, in the midst of turmoil? Love, when you feel unloved? Hope, when things seem hopeless? There is only one way and that is to be with the One who IS peace, who IS hope....who IS love!

We fill our lives with so much. Things that we think are so important, but we give God but a few moments and then we wonder why we don't have His peace and joy and love in our lives. He is the source of all Good. In order to have good things we must "be" with Him. If you long to "shine forth light"....you must be with "The Light"....want to be loving and feel loved? You must spend TIME with Love Himself. He then pours HIMSELF into us....filling us so that we can pour out.

I was reading in Psalms this morning....no wonder its said of David, that he was man after God's own heart. David spent TIME with God....in intimacy. "O God, You are my God; earnestly will I seek You; my inner self thirsts for You, my flesh longs and is faint for You, in a dry and weary land, where no water is." Ps 63:1 amp "My whole being follows hard after You and clings closely to You;" Ps 64:8 amp

Have you ever experienced God? I don't mean do you believe in God....I mean experience Him as a person? Ever see Him clearly? Ever feel His presence? Ever hear His voice? If not, you are sorely missing out on Life itself...Himself. God is real, not a dream, vision, prayer, thought, He's real.

Ever just go to Psalms and read it looking for mention of God and His character or what is written about Him? I've been doing that just recently. Just a verse...one verse alone , when you dwell on it , meditate on it and really try to understand it can cause you to have a headache....."Before the moutains were brought forth, or ever You had formed and given birth to the earth and the world, even from ever lasting to everlasting You are God." Ps 90:2 God has no beginning and no end. Ok, stop there and ponder, think on that, dwell there!! We can't even understand that thought. God is sooooo much bigger than what we think or believe.

God is inifinately Good, Loving, faithful, etc, etc....and yet, we spend so little time with Him and fill our lives with everything that is LESS. Reading Psalms you can see that David had an inkling of who God is, as he spent time with Him. He wanted to dwell in God's courts, he tells God he longs for Him. The more time we spend with God, to KNOW HIM, the more we will want Him. God doesn't want a "glance" from us....He wants our entire hearts. Wow! What we don't understand is that He is LIFE, He is LOVE, and we are full to overflowing, lacking in NOTHING if we run after Him with all our hearts. Its a lie straight from the enemy (and one of his greatest deceptions) when we think we are giving up something of value in order to pursue God. There is nothing more wonderful than God, and yet, we live our lives as if everything else is more worth our time, our pursuit, our hearts than Him.

Oh, believe me, I'm only scratching the surface....I'm soooo far from "arriving". But...I smile as I say this....I'm beginning to see....to see HIM....and I'm beginning to understand that He's worth it....worth all!! I'm beginning to long for His presence. It's only a beginning, but I know this beginning of my hearts pursuit of Him is pleasing to Him...and He promises...."And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart." Jer 29:13

I want to experience God. Not something "of God"....but God Himself. I won't stop until I do. I want to say along with David, "Whom have I in heaven but You? And I have no delight or desire on earth beside You." Ps 73:24 amp Ever feel DELIGHTED IN GOD? Be honest!!

"As the hart (deer) pants and longs for the water brooks, so I pant and long for You, O God. My inner self thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and behold the face of God?" Ps 42:1,2 amp

God is the ultimate prize. He is the treasure worth selling all for. Get to know Him, personally, for yourself. See if He alone will satisfy your soul. His word promises that. He can't do that when your soul is full already. Go, get your bible out and go before THE KING....the Creator of all things and lay all your burdens down and go into His presence. Ask Him to reveal Himself to you. He longs for intimacy with you, He will reveal Himself to you. He's worth it!

Walking with God

I was asked by my sister to do an "aha" moment in my life and the following is what I sent her:

To Walk with HIM

I've been a christian for 37 years, having sat at the kitchen table with my Dad as a young girl, I asked Jesus into my heart. I've tried to live a good christian life; reading His word, praying, going to church, worshipping Him, bearing fruit, etc.

About a year and a half ago, my "AHa" moment happened. I could almost feel the Father's loving hands holding my face, as He began to open the eyes of my heart. I had been doing all the "right things", trying to live for God, but He revealed to me that my heart was far from Him. I could then see that I was not passionately in love with my God, why not? He said to me, "Because you don't know Me." I didn't know Him? How was that possible? I've been reading my Bible for 351/2 years, I've heard His voice speak to my heart many times over, I've even received a miracle from Him. (to share at a later time) How have I missed Him? The fact that I lacked a passion for Him was something I could no longer ignore.

Thus my current journey began...my heart's cry to My God, "I want to know You, that I might love You passionately, as You love me, please reveal Yourself to me." I purposed in my heart to journey into God's heart, to know Him, as the Apostle Paul wrote so many years ago, "[For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him - that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and reconizing and understanding [the wonders of His person] more strongly and more clearly." Heb 3:10 amp

As I started this new walk, I began reading the Word with new intent and passion, to see and know my God. My hunger for His word grew as He began to reveal Himself to me in those pages. Oh how I'm beginning to fall in love with Him. Oh how He loves me. He's been patiently waiting for this very "AHA" moment, my entire life, "to walk with Him, and not merely for Him."

I get it now, I do, the very reason He created me was to be in a passionate love relationship with Him, the Living God. I cannot tell you how radically this revelation has changed my life. It's become my "1 thing", to walk with Him, to love Him, to know Him."

I wrote this on 03/11/11 and this is still my determined purpose....to walk with Him and to know Him. I guess that's why I have "claimed" to have heard His voice about my healing....for each morning I long to open my bible and hear His sweet voice....and you can too.

I've been reading a book that says this: "What does it take to begin a relationship with God? Is it to devote yourself to unselfish religious deeds? Is it to attempt to become a better person, so that God will accept you? Can a person actually embark on a journey that leads to knowing God? The overwhelming claim of the Bible is yes! Not only can we know the Lord and the Creator of everything that exists, we are invited - even urged- to know Him intimately, personally, and deeply." ("Romancing The King" by Brian Lake)

You may sense it or maybe you don't have any idea, but the Lord and Creator of everything is calling out your name. He longs for a deep, intimate, passionate relationship with you.

Missing Parts

Good Morning,
I've been putting off this blog, for its hard to expose oneself. My heart races when I think of the fact that many people, especially loved ones, are reading this blog and watching to see IF God moves on my behalf this summer. Yeah, what a claim....I'm either really out there and plain crazy, or God really does speak to our hearts and when we have time and quiet ourselves enough, we hear Him. I'm also very human and very fleshly, and very fallible. I could have misinterpreted what He was speaking to me and we all know that sometimes we miss it all together. I'm still convinced that I'm hearing from the very one and only living God and that in His timing, I will stand whole in the name of Jesus Christ.

There is a few specific details that I've left out that I have felt that I need to share. In the last few years there has been drastic changes in my body, lower body to be exact. I have lost alot of my feeling. In my legs, it feels as though when touched, that I have on heavy, heavy leg warmers or a thick sports wrap, I can hardly feel when touched. I have fallen quite a bit, I have to walk ever so gingerly...watching every step I take. I try to always go barefoot, as any sandal or shoe, no matter how light or well fit, catches and I stumble.
I also barely feel when I need to go to the bathroom, and I have frequent accidents. At first this was soooo embarrassing, but after many of them, even in public, I just shrug my shoulders and finish my task, go home and change.
I HATE all these changes, but I've learned to turn my anger towards the enemy, and not my body because I refuse to let him discourage me. My hope is in the Lord, who made the heavens and the earth, and loves me so much He calls me His beloved. (by the way, if you have never been told this....He calls YOU His beloved too!!!!!)

I've also left out, by accident, that the Doctors have all agreed on one thing....I will eventually need surgery, its just a matter of when I decide to have it and take my chances. They also agree that medically speaking, once a nerve is damaged, it NEVER recovers or works again. I realize that this is a FACT, but changing facts is nothing for my God.

Please continue to check this blog for updates and EVENTUALLY see the Glory of our God.
"For I am fully satisfied and assured that God is able and mighty to keep His word and to do what He has promised me" Rom 4:21

Oh my sweet Jesus, how I love You and desire to love You more.